the pros and cons of the blogging community (let's spill it)

You either clicked on this link because you yourself are a blogger, small business owner, or your a friend of mine who is nosy to see the in's and out's of what I do in the blogging world (don't worry, I'll be answering all that in a video series coming soon on my Youtube channel.) Shameless self promotion at it's finest. Anyways, where was I? Oh! Right! If you are one of those people then this post may be of upmost interest to you. Disclaimer: I am not going to be trash talking anyone and or using any names. If you came here to claim me as another number in your "hate fest" of another blogger or idea, I am not your girl. Count me out. I am simply writing because the more and more new bloggers come up on the scene the more and more I see them falling intro trends and traps of the blogging community. Having been only in this community for a little over a year, I have learned so much, and there is still so much to learn. I do not claim to be a professional and have SOOO many experiences to gage a FACTUAL opinion on. I am only stating my personal opinion of the pros and cons of the blogging community based on personal experiences I have had or seen others have. Now that that's out of the way, let's get into it. I'll be going back and forth between pros and cons to keep in interesting.) Shall we begin?

PRO NUMBER 1: The actual community. Okay, there is this huge theory that as technology grows, our social connections to one another lessen. I may find that true in a setting where you turn to your phone at the dinner table to rid silence of it's awkwardness but most of the time, there is a world of people just waiting to connect with you at your finger tips. Real people with real connections. My grandma would be utterly shocked to know most of my friends now-a-days I actually met through Instagram, and I have yet to be killed! Yay! Okay, that took a weird turn but you get it. Times are changing and so should we. Now, I can't deny that putting my phone down, and meeting people in a real life setting is so much more enjoyable, but I also can't deny the fact that I do have a social influence to make and most of that is done online. I have gained the best of friends, learned so much, had amazing opportunities, and the best laughs with the fellow bloggers/social influencers I have met because of Instagram. Heck, two of my close friends and I text every single day. I have made lifelong friends and networking connections because of this community. I am forever grateful, and honored to be a part of it. 

CON NUMBER 1: FAKE PEOPLE. Okay this has to be the first bad thing I talk about because it's the most common of them all. The thing is, it's so common that I have learned how to detect the "THIS PERSON DOENS'T ACTUALLY CARE ABOUT YOU, THEY WANT SOMETHING FROM YOU" warning signs that I barely spend much time and effort dealing with it anymore. I can smell disingenuous people from a mile away.  I can honestly say that I no longer care nor find any offense in my heart towards these people. But they are there, and so I have to talk about it. Sometimes someone will follow your page, and not ever read your blog. *GASP* It happens all the time. I guess it's not so crazy to most because we are the most visually stimulated generation yet, so I can safely assume I've lost over half of my readers already by this paragraph because of the simple fact that we don't like to read. Personally, I would rather read something than to see another 20 photo spread of your face again, but hey. Words are my jam, and other people's pain. In other instances, some people might even befriend you because they want something you have, not something you are. For example, I can't tell you how many coffee dates I have gone on where I can tell within the first 30 minutes that they don't care about me they want my knowledge, my creativity, my talent, my resources, my contacts, my connections, ect... In these moments, I (like any other person would, jeez) am nice and then find an excuse to leave. I value my creativity. I value my brain. I value my talent. I value the months it took me to get a contact. I value the resources I have because it was all a result of God blessing me and working hard. That is to be protected, not to be stepped on because someone else is lazy and a spoiled brat. (Okay, I said no trash talk, but I just had to let that out...moving on.) 

PRO NUMBER 2:  You learn so much. So this is what everyone's motive is when they first get into the community, is to grow and learn as much as you can as a blogger. And as that is not entirely wrong. If that is your ONLY motive, then without knowing, you probably are the con number one. You see, I'm a little creepy. I like stalking someone who maybe is a blogger, photographer or social influencer for weeks. Like I strategically plan on getting to know the person behind the cool shadow photos. I want to know what they're like on a bad day, good day, when they're goofy, when they're working hard. I want to see them for them. After that I usually dm them and plan a coffee date. I also strategically plan on putting my phone away the entire time I first meet them. It's also in these moments I can instantly figure out if they too are in it for a friendship by how many times they are on their phone. I want them to know that though they have stalked me, though they see me post coffee dates with friends in the past, that's not what I'm there for. If in the end, they want to post a selfie, I'm down. But I'm not there to add a handle to my photo for the likes, or engagement. I'm there to know you, talk to you, laugh with you, and more. Through these times I learn not only who you are, but what you know and you learn what I know. I have learned how to edit my photos better, how to write emails for brands, how to pose, how to make a media kit, how to go to events and more just in the moments of hanging out with my blogging friends. Sometimes you'll be rewarded with what you're looking for when you have the RIGHT intentions from the start and you treat people with the utmost respect and love. 

CON NUMBER 2: Inconsistency. I have to say out of all the connections I have made over the past year and a half, only a handful of those have remained very consistent. The other connections made have been floaters, floating in and out for whatever reason. Maybe some of those reasons are legitimate; work, school, travel, ect and maybe some are based on a need to perhaps "switch it up." Either way, being someone who can easily attach themselves emotionally to another, I have to protect my very sensitive soul and just stick to the ones who are consistent. It's a little troubling when I see someone who likes all my pictures, comments, hangs out with me, watches my content and supports me for a while, then goes M.I.A. I can't always hate on that, I myself get busy with life since blogging is not the only thing I do, but I know time is fleeting and being someone who is serious about growing as a influencer and wants to see where this can take me, I only have time for those who are consistent. 

PRO NUMBER 3: And last but not least, Confidence. I have to say because of this community I am way more confident as a blogger and social influencer than ever before. I used to not go to events, never dm someone first, and be too shy to meet new people (it still scares me), but meeting the girls in this community have really opened my eyes to see what true "support" really looks like. Man, if I do a collab with a brand, my girls are on it with the likes, and comments because they know that I need that engagement to grow and have better work opportunities, and feedback to grow as a person. I am daily being encouraged and complimented. I get feedback on my work all the time and this community pushes me to be better every day. Doing this alone is impossible and not as fun, but doing it with others builds that confidence in you that you need to succeed and go further than you ever thought possible. 

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